Obviously, everyone gets frustrated at some point but how we express it matters a great deal because we don't want to hurt others by hurting ourselves.
We can aggravate ourselves and others with how we express our frustration. Being frustrated is a reasonable response when we feel hurt, threatened, or incapable of fulfilling our current needs.
Our reaction to frustration is often formed very early in life. For instance, we may mimic our parents' reactions or respond based on our life experiences.
You may need to learn a new way of thinking about and reacting to frustrating situations if they cause problems in your life.
∙ Unhealthy ways of resolving frustration can lead to health problems and cause us to lose our interpersonal relationships.
An Effective Way to Manage Frustration
There are multiple factors needed to deal effectively with frustration. People usually have difficulty expressing their frustration constructively. They tend to become angry, give up, or engage in self-destructive behavior.
Here are some ideas you can use to reduce the frustration you feel in day-to-day life, also to help you react peacefully and patiently:
1. Establish mutual respect. It is crucial that you respect everyone involved, even if they have opposing opinions to your own. If you are frustrated by every speaker's opinion, you'll waste precious time.
2. Understand your thoughts, feelings, and needs. Find out who you are rather than imitating others' opinions and beliefs.
3. Understand the differences between surface needs and primary needs. In other words, is this frustration about one of your basic needs not being met, or is it merely due to a less significant, secondary need? What's preventing you from meeting this need?
4. Keep in mind what you can control and what you cannot. There are some causes of frustration that are out of your control. Invest your energy in managing them so you can move on.
5. Communication should be constructive. The ability to speak up respectfully and calmly without any judgment or shame means being able to speak up for yourself and others so everyone's needs can be met.
6. Be careful not to take responsibility for the actions of others. Every individual has freedom of choice, so you cannot make them do anything you want. A rational adult will make their own decisions, so be responsible for your own decisions. Remember, only you have the authority to make your own choices, and no one else can force you to.
7. It is essential to find out what caused the problem. You will lose your grip on frustration when you identify the root cause of your hurt or frustration and not blame others.
8. It's important to remember that frustration isn't always a bad thing. Frustration can motivate you to change if specific problems in your life keep you from reaching your goals.
∙ Consider your progression in meeting your life goals. Where do you think you will be in five or ten years? Sometimes you will need to make changes to your life and develop new goals to reduce your frustration and turn your plan into a reality.
9. Accept the present reality. When frustration manifests as anger towards something beyond our control, we need to learn to accept life's realities.
∙ The situation may be beyond your control, such as being stuck in traffic, so you can learn to take it as it comes. Also, remember to breathe deeply and control your breath.
You could allow frustration to hinder your progress and prevent you from achieving those goals you have set for yourself. Understand that while frustration cannot be eliminated from your life, it can be managed to make it less unhealthy.
© Copyright 2021. Actualization of Self Institute, LLC. & Denise R Dunkley. All rights reserved.